We spent a few hours as a family today down at the VFW, packing food for the troops overseas with “Operation Shoebox“. I was glad that Aidan and Matt came along to give a hand, because it was a Girl Scout Troop activity. We got service hours for it, and I had the girls’ mothers (or fathers) stay – I was afraid I’d lose the girls in the crowd, and besides, I wanted to be able to concentrate on my own family a bit. We made thank-you cards, and lined up to pack boxes with necessities that people had donated – tons of them. Deodorant, shampoos, conditioners and moisturizers (many travel-sized from hotels), socks, food, pens and paper, candy, stuffed animals…you name it.

The coolest thing I think we did was that we signed a BIG sheet with personal messages. This wouldn’t have been as cool if there wasn’t a photograph of a handful of soldiers holding our sheet from last year, and we could see our own messages in the photo. The girls really got a lot out of that – it made what they were doing more substantial. There were also parents of soldiers there, by our sides, packing boxes to send over.

Last year when we did this, I felt very dichotomized…I don’t support the war in Iraq, and this is a mandatory activity for Girl Scouts in our area. The more I thought about it, though, the more clear it became for me. I didn’t have to support the war to support the sons and daughters who were putting their lives on the line every day. Whether I agreed with the reasons they were there, I could support the people without supporting the cause.

I love having my brain pried open a little bit at a time, and I love unlearning the biases I was taught as a child. Although I really didn’t want to lead this troop at the beginning of 2007 (not having a co-leader is only a small reason why), I’ve had experiences that have changed me, and I’m grateful for them.

Aidan pulled me aside at bedtime a few months ago, and asked “Why does everyone have a girlfriend but me?” I was taken aback. He is, after all, 11. I let him know that *not* everyone his age had a girlfriend, and opened a conversation about it. It’s been common knowledge that he’s been ‘interested’ in a girl in his grade for some time, but he was adamant that they were just friends…it seemed that the interest wasn’t reciprocated.

I picked up Aidan at school yesterday, and when he got into the car, he was grinning ear to ear. This girl came up to him at recess, and asked him if he wanted to be her boyfriend.  He nonchalantly shrugged, and said, “sure”, and they hugged.

Oh, to be eleven again:) Then again, maybe not!!

Last night he asked me if I had any advice for him on relationships (I *love* that he feels comfortable enough to come to me!!), and I told him to take everything slow and enjoy it. After all, there will only be one ‘first time’ for walking down the hall holding hands, one for a kiss on the lips, and these things should be savored. He agreed, and told me he’d “let her make the first moves”.

I’m proud and scared. My baby is growing up!!

I was watching a movie called “Rock Star” the other day, with Mark Walberg and Jennifer Aniston. It’s a mediocre movie, but the very last scene has this amazing song… I first heard it years ago (when I saw the movie for the first time), and had to get it this time around.

I want to share it with you… The song is by a band called The Verve Pipe, and the song is called Colorful, written by Brian Vander Ark:
~~~~~~

The show is over close the story book
There will be no encore
And all the random hands that I have shook
Well they’re reaching for the door
I watch their backs as they leave single file
But you stood stubborn, cheering all the while

I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser’s living fortunate
Cause I know you will love me either way

Most were being good for goodness sake
But you wouldn’t pantomime
You are more beautiful when you awake
Than most are in a lifetime
Through the haze that is my memory well
You stayed for drama though you paid for a comedy

I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser’s living fortunate
Cause I know you will love me either way
Look ahead as far as you can see

We’ll live in drama but we’ll die in a comedy
I know I can be colorful…

I know I tend to be a little OCD. I knew if I didn’t write in this blog every day, I would let it fall by the wayside. It’s the way I work, and a bit like sobriety. I stay sober a day at a time. I need to blog a day at a time too. If I slip, it’s hard to get back on the wagon. Perhaps that’s why I’ve been sober for 19+ years.

So you might ask “Where have you been, Fae?” Or you might not. But if you did, or you were thinking that I dropped off the wanted to, I’ll tell you where I’ve been.

Facebook.

Now, it’s not as bad as you might think. I’m working very hard on an area of my studies that has to do with changing the world around me, and I’ve realized that I tend to hibernate in winter. I can do them both on Facebook.

Many people I know are addicted to Twitter, or making hours go by playing mindless games.  I don’t accept invitations to join any group or application that doesn’t have a positive end – and there are several on Facebook. The one I got addicted to is called (Lil) Green Patch,  and when as you use the application, money is given to help save the rain forest. No, really.  They’ve saved more than 96,000,000 square feet as of November.  The company behind this is called the Nature Conservancy, Inc, and they’re a 501 (c)(3) nonprofit.

Here’s some cutting and pasting from their page(on Facebook, of course!) There’s a regular URL too…

I’ve saved close to 100 square feet myself so far, and I’ve hooked in with a bunch of people who make moving up the ranks and making it more fun. If you know me on Facebook, check out my Green Patch page, it’s pretty cool. You can even friend me, if you dare, and if you get hooked like me, I’ll send you expensive flowers every day:) Drop me a note if you want my info, and we’ll go from there.

So, anyway, I’m going to try to get myself back on the wagon and blog every day. It’s an integral part of my studies, and I think I was getting a lot out of writing and being written to by people like you.

I just have to get Matt to fix the damn RSS feed into Outlook. If anyone can help us troubleshoot that, please let me know…I had all my favorite blog posts in my inbox every day, and now I have to go hunt them down, and of course I’m not doing it, which I hate about myself. 

Whew, it’s nice to write. I feel like I’m reaching out of my hibernation den for familiar hands:)